A Queer Love is Blind
dear friends, I think we have an algorithm there is math involved sorry
Very different from what I usually camp out in, in terms of writing but I can write whatever I want, and if we’re being the bad selves we are known to be, I have to say, a creative niche is a road that leads to no inspiration. I wrote this in 2021 so it’s time to put it on the web because it’s in a college-ruled 1-subject purple notebook with french fry grease all over it.
Every time I see a dating show that centers on a hetero-cis setting, I immediately think can this happen for queer people? And the usual response from others is that it would be impossible.
Then I saw MTV’s Are You The One? A dating show that has contestants who for many seasons are cis men and women secretly paired into being a couple via an algorithm and everyone has to figure out who the couples are. Season 8 was the first time the cast was queer and trans.
I’m a reality tv show junkie, and I’m obsessed with unscripted television the twist and turns are better than a motion picture big thriller, and let’s not forget, I also love how reality tv has given many Black people an income and platform that can launch careers for the person whose life is so interesting it deserves a camera crew. That is impressive and should be applauded more often.
If you haven’t watched the Netflix hit Love Is Blind that’s okay you don’t really have to, but what you need to know is that it’s a social experiment that is similar to blind dating with a speed dating element. 15 men and 15 women are separated and have to date each other in a speed dating format, they can’t see each other and they can only connect in a pod which is like a room where they talk through essentially a wall and date, they ask questions, names birthday astrology career, etc. To then eventually, get engaged and get married.
When I saw this my partner and I joked about how if there was a queer Love is Blind it would crash the format, and I wanted to find out why it would so I started writing how it would work.
Let’s stop pretending that producers aren’t playing god when it comes to these reality shows. in order for a queer Love is Blind to work playing god is what one will have to do.
Let’s choose our fighters! Hello Lesbians! This doesn’t exclude ( trans women & non-binary people, trans-masculine-centered folks )
This is possible it just requires some leg work.
Behind the scenes
We’re going to round up 100 best-dressed people assuming they’re queer, interviews around the clock, and each person will be given a personality quiz this personality quiz is very queer. Think of those little questionnaires on dating apps. Remember we have to narrow that 100 to 30-20 folks for the actual show.
This personality quiz will be about you.
Is this considered against the premise of love is blind no not when it comes to a queer setting. As queer people gauge their partners due to many factors that involve roles, roles that are already assumed in heterosexual relationships. These roles aren’t visible when it comes to queer relationships, sometimes we think it is due to someone being femme or masculine but there are and can be preferences in queer relationships, for example, top bottom and sometimes not at all, we call that verse ( versatile)
Hey listen we sometimes label ourselves via our preferences, it’s a little patriarchal we’re gay, not perfect.
So instead of asking a question on the personality quiz that looks like this:
Check the box that applies to you
I would ask the question below instead. This question would be better suited because the above is asking about your physical look and remember LOVE IS BLIND so how you self-express or self-label doesn’t determine your preferences. This also gives an opportunity for two matches that wouldn’t probably connect due to a physical look.
Check the box that applies to you
We want to eliminate the limits we’ve put on ourselves when dating. But also the main reason for the personality quiz would be to determine how to separate the groups that have to date each other in the pods. Still with me? This can work! And the reason why this can work is because, so many queer relationships including my own have started as long distance, purely emotional, and with no physical intimacy. The success rate of queer Love is Blind, I believe would be high.
In the original Love is Blind the women and men are in separate living quarters. So that they don’t see each other. After the dates, the men will go back to their living arrangements and talk with the guys about who they like and who is dating who and who their most interested in and the women would do the same.
How do we do that with queer folks? Because we can’t separate by gender, so this is why the personality quiz is vital.
The main worry about separating the groups is that people will date outside the pods or find love outside the pods, I truly don’t believe that would happen as there are so many hours put into the speed dating format there wouldn’t be much time to fall in love with someone in living areas. And we can put a strict rule saying if you do find love outside pods great happy for you, but you’re out, and who wants to leave a reality tv show? I also hate this trope that if you stick all the gays in the room we’d all fall in love.
This isn’t meant to be perfect it’s a social experiment and experiments fail. But the possibility of failure doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be tested. And one could say due to the low success rate of Love is Blind failure isn’t stopping them. Two couples saying “ I do” is a success. And the couples that say “ I do not’” Make great TV. So I wouldn’t say the show is a failure. If there is a specific goal that is trying to be met, then the experiment part of it not going that well.
Since we are creating an algorithm using the personality quiz, for those who have chosen verse, we will then figure out which living quarter they are best suited for, by a new series of questions that will then show us where they belong.
The quiz is a placement test, It’s going to require a lot more gay muscle but that’s why it’s an experiment. There are many possibilities within an experiment. So if the verse’s answers align more with living quarter A rather than living quarter B that’s where they’ll be placed.
This quiz isn’t about who you want as a partner but who you are as a partner. That determines where you belong and increases your chances with a partner.
There are different ways to put the verses in the rooms
essentially there will be probably 6 verses in each room. 6 to every 9 bottom or 9 top.
I don’t want to lose you so I’ll keep it short. Depending on how many people are used in the experiment I think makes a difference in the success rate.
So 30 people would mean 15 in living area A and 15 in living area B
Or we use 20 people 10 in living area A and 10 in living area B
The reason why I use 30 down to 20 is that I think the number of contestants can contribute to whether people are having enough time to date each other due to the format of speed dating and a television show.
I’m rambling but listen, the success rate for Love is Blind is low, like really low. I’m not sure if it’s because the couples aren’t given enough days to be together I wouldn’t know, but percentage-wise the success with marriages are like under 8 percent. ( it’s lower I’m being nice) And there are parts of me that truly believe it has a lot to do with heteronormative stuff but that is for another rant.
Okay some quick gay maths, let’s group these numbers by season.
Season 1 and 2: 60 Contestants 12 couples got engaged
Math: 24/60(100)= 40%
Season 3 and 4: 60 contestants this time only 10 couples got engaged
Math: 20/60(100) you get a whole bunch of 0.333333333 = 33 %
It’s getting lower people!
Engagement doesn’t even mean that they will say I do at the altar.
I can go on but the point is about more than 50 percent of these couples get divorced.
Who is ready to Uhaul? Tagline for the show?
I think if we’re watching the show for all the romantic reasons which is we hope these random strangers who have only met for 5 minutes get married then I think a format has to change a formula has to be introduced that gives a higher chance of more “ I do’s” There are so many details to comb through and I can’t give all my secrets away or my math and especially what’s on my personality quiz. But I believe the success rate of Love is Blind could be higher and why not test this social experiment on people who love to uhaul?! The drama would be out of this world.
I don’t think I am the only person that has thought about queer Love is Blind but I want to let yall know it is possible.
To the producer who will steal this just include me, all I ask or I will send an army.